Oh good grief!

Death. Not something you'd put on your to do list. But something that is going to happen, to all of us at one point. Such a scary thought, to imagine your loved ones pass away or you yourself be wiped away from this Earth. Ahh, not something I'm looking forward to at least not until after, I've become a successful business woman, found true love, and had a family;) Yup, I',m sure everyone has experienced a death in there family, or friends. It's not a good feeling. Every time I hear an ambulance, I stop and think oh no, I hope eveything is okay. I hope no one is hurt=( I can't even begin to think how awful it would feel if it happened to someon in my family. And it did. I didnt get all the deets. But I know he is in critical condition. It's not fair he's so young, and has his whole life ahead of him. Last month my grandmother passed away, after battling stomach cancer i beleive. Oh it was just awful, such a sweet, loving caring woman. Everybody loved her. Sometimes I just think why God let this happen to her, such a terrible and painful disease to give her. What bad thing did she ever do to deserve it. Like bad things happen to the good people. Well I hope that's not true. I suppose God has a plan for all of us. It's up to the big man to decide our future's. I just hope he takes into consideration those that are good people, and do value life and goes easy on them. It's up to us as well how we want to live our lifes.
Well I could ramble on for hours! lol;) But it's nighty night.
Time to pray for my loved ones.=] goodnight!

Siblings children. . .

Ughhh!!! I am completely filled with rage. Yet again, I must babysit my niece. don't get me wrong I love that kid to death! But she's just annoyin to take care of. Just turned a year, and she's as spoiled as ever. She's my sister's daughter, and this whole winter break i've been babysitting her. Two weeks!!!! and it's pretty much all day. from 6:30 to 2:30 that's when my mom gets off work. But even then I'm still the one watching her, because my mother supposedly has things to do around the house. . . !!!!!! Until around 7:30 when her mom gets home. EVEN THEN, she's so tired that i have to keep watching her. So for another two hours she stays and relaxes around the house while i yet again must take care of the baby!!!!!! UGHHHHHH!! It's not fair that I must give up my xmas break, on nothing but BABYSITTING.

I'm 17 I'm supposed to be out and about with my friends. But no, I've hardly even talked to my friends or my boyfriend. I haven't done anything these whole two weeks. I went to the store probably like twice. So i've been in my house like 24/7. Like a dang prisoner! And to make me just about wanna cry, I'm not getting anything for this? No money no nothing. =( Apparently before my sister had her baby she always bought me stuff when we'd hang out and this is just my way of paying her back. I've babysat that kid since she was 2 months. I'm pretty sure I've already payed her back, possibly even went over. And my sister has the nerve to come home and say I didnt care of her right. =P

The practical side of me is like it's okay, it's practice for when I have kids. But pshh! I'm sick of always being the one babysitting. i probably watch her more than her own parents do. They just act like lazy bums all day. Immature lazy bums!

The other side of me, just wants to get out!! . . . Out of this house and out of this life. My social life is terribly suffering because of this=( Everytime someone asks me to hang out or something I can't because what am I doing? The same thing i do everyday. So once school starts, I don't even care if I get in trouble, I am going out everyday after school and staying out late too. Well, it's late. Nighty night.